Watching The Monster Club Again

The heat and humidity has returned in force, and I'm here at the apartment again for the night, and after five hours the air conditioner has barely put a dent in the humidity. It's enough to make a Shadmock whistle. 

We went to the fireworks display at Davis Park last night. Dragged Jack the entire way there in a wagon. At first he wasn't interested, but he ended up thinking it was awesome. We have to be vigilant about his ears because he has hearing loss in one ear. Had a taco, then we headed home. 

Watching The Monster Club again. tried to watch Dead Pit earlier, and I remember liking the colors in the past, but it was a German dubbed version and I couldn't get into it. I feel like I should read the book by R Chetwynd Hayes some time. Probably could be done in an evening. This is the only blog I'm working on today, and it has no point.

An unexpected thunderstorm would be nice. But I don't expect it.

If my mammy was a shammy, and my daddy was a raddy, I wonder what kind of monster I'll turn out to be. Saw some Thriller Video tapes on Ebay today that I don't have in my collection, but I'm strapped for cash. 

The Two Faces of Evil was the one I wanted the most

The Two Faces of Evil from Thriller Video

This is the only blog I still use the font Arial on. I was once quite fond of it. Now I'm largely indifferent. I really circled the drain this afternoon. All the gravity was sucked from my Universe and I almost went down the hole. But I held on. A few days ago I could have floated away, but I stayed here. I may have another cup of tea. 

oh, someone bought five copies of The Blood Dark Sea today, the book of outlaw poetry I just published, and I thought it was a mistake, so I contacted the customer and he said it was a legitimate order, he intends to give them away as gifts. A fine gift of a great book. 

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Shadmock

Actor James Laurenson portrayed a character called Raven the Shadmock in the 1981 horror movie The Monster Club, from the book of the same name by British writer R. Chetwynd-Hayes. The Shadmock is described by Vincent Price's character Erasmus in The Monster Club as being the lowest on the wrung of monsterdom, but possessing this power. 

The lowly Shadmock. (lower left)

What power could this possibly be inquires a curious John Carradine, who's character, the aforementioned R. Chetwynd Hayes has just voluntarily offered Erasmus a meal of his blood and been repaid by the grateful vampire with inclusion in a secret club of monsters known as (you guessed it) The Monster Club. Now, in the safety of the Monster Club, surrounded by werewolves, ghouls, zombies, and creatures too revolting for the human imagination, Vincent Price begins to tell the tale of the lowly Shadmock to Carradine. 

Raven Shadmock is a gentle enough bloke. In fact, he's downright overly polite and demure. He never leaves the confines of his estate and considers the pigeons his only friends.

One day this cat, who I have always called Figeroa although he's not listed in the credits, makes the mistake of doing this. Which angers Raven Shadmock into using his awesome monster power. A power so horrific even vampires fear it. the power to...

Whistle. That's right, Shadmock's are whistlers. One starts humming Sittin' On the Dock of the Bay and that's your ass. You don't find that frightening? Well, I know a man who saw the effects of a Shadmock's whistle once. That's all he saw. And yet. And yet...

Make it stop. I'll actually let you watch The Monster Club yourself, or read the book, to learn what happens when a Shadmock whistles.

Drawing of Raven Shadmock by artist Jenny Mathews

Buy books by Thomas L. Vaultonburg

                                  

Here are some pictures where actor James Lauresnson isn't being Shadmocky at all. In fact, Laurenson has a diverse acting career on stage and off that includes the movie The Wall and several portrayals of Shakespearean characters from Rosencrantz in Hamlet to The Earl of Westmoreland in Henry V, a role he is currently filming. I doubt actor James Laurenson gets asked about playing the only Shadmock ever filmed except by a few weirdos like me, but I wonder how he feels about the role. 

I am currently compiling a data base of men who look like Shadmocks. Currently I have only one entry, Indiana University basketball coach Tom Crean, but feel free to add to the list if you know of anyone who looks like a Shadmock in real life. 

Shadmocked.

February 11, 2013 update: With the Indiana men's basketball team seeming to possess a seemingly supernatural hold on the #1 spot in the men's rankings, one wonders if coach Tom Crean isn't doing a little whistling during games to throw off opposing players.

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March Madness Gets Even Madder

March Madness gets even madder when it is revealed that Indiana coach Tom Crean is a...

Shadmock!!!!

I think it's best Vinnie the P explains what a Shadmock is.

Now that you know what it is a Shadmock is and what they do it is my obligation as to inform you that Indiana basketball coach Tom Crean is...

A Shadmock!!!

No, coach, don't whistle. I'll play help-side defense, I swear.

Tom, this is uncle Lichtem calling up from the old country. I just put a million on IU to beat Kentucky in the third round. I trust you won't let me down, nephew.

Bow down to my awesome Photoshop skills

Tommmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry, uncle Lichtem.

He really was a good boy. Just couldn't coach a zone defense for shit.

February 21, 2013 update: I just secured a copy of the super rare Monster Club Soundtrack on Ebay, and the Indiana men's basketball team is ranked #1 in the nation. Coincidence? I think not.

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