Before most of you were even born I had won three Presidential Physical Fitness Awards. I would have won a fourth, but I left school at the age of ten to be a physical fitness consultant on Chuck Norris movies. I also learned at a very young age to take stellar photographs under even the most adverse conditions. For instance, as I was about to shoot this photograph of my third Presidential Physical Fitness Award, a brownie (that's a mythical creature,look it up) dashed out from a corner of my apartment, punched me in the balls, and ran back into a closet. It's amazing I was able to finish taking the photograph at all, let alone take such a breathtaking photo of my third Presidential Physical Fitness Award. You got questions about the flexed arm hang, I'm your guy.  |
| Presidential Physical Fitness Award |
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