Five Ways To Make Money With Poetry

Poetry is a notoriously parsimonious profession. But there are ways for the industrious poet to eek out a meager existence. Here are five.

1) Sell drugs to poets.

2) Recycle the organic milk bottles of depressed poets.

3) Write a position paper titled The Problem of Poets and How To Solve It and submit it to the NSA for funding.

4) Sublet your utility room to poets for an endless open mic reading. Promptly seal the room off and cut the mic. 

5) Fill an Igloo cooler with the kidneys and livers of homeless poets. Someone will contact you with delivery instructions.


Listen to Outgoing Answering Machine Messages of Famous Poets

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