Zombie Logic Notes For The 2013 Fantasy Football Playoffs

Hall of Bad Dudes General Manager Dr. Millard Rausch

I played nine fantasy football teams this year. Which is insane, and I knew it was wrong when I was doing it. Despite being bold enough to write occasional columns here at Zombie Logic offering fantasy football advice, I had a terrible fantasy season last year. And after writing my traditional pre-draft columns about busts and undervalued players here again this year, my fantasy season started abysmally. I had multiple teams start 0-3. I had drafted a lot of busts, like David Wilson, and I was paying for it. Julio Jones' injury hamstrung me. Colin Kaepernick didn't help matters by seeming to lose all the magic he had in the last few games of last year. Worst of all, I fell into the pit most fantasy players did: I drafted running backs early and often. Every year there seems to be one prevailing theme that most drafters buy into, and this year it was that running backs are scarce, and if you don't get yours early, you'll be left out in the cold. However, exactly the opposite turned out to be true. Because many of the running backs drafted early turned out to be great disappointments, like Spiller, Rice, David Wilson, Chris Johnson, Steven Jackson. Doug Martin, and because it became apparent by week three that your flex position was going to be filled by a wide receiver rather than a running back most of the time, running backs sort of became an afterthought. You just needed two. And if you were one of those who waited until later for a QB like Kaepernick or Luck while you were piling up those running backs with your early picks, you were getting your brains beat in my Manning or Brees or Rodgers every week. Worse still, Calvin Johnson or Jimmy Graham was probably beating you single- handedly a lot of weeks.

Unless you managed to right the ship if you made these mistakes, you're not going to the playoffs. I am more than pleased to crow, because despite making all these blunders, I made the playoffs in 6 out of those nine leagues. An early trade for Drew Brees in one league was the defining turning point. Josh Gordon, who I made a point to draft and stash in multiple leagues, was also a bacon saver. One of my better strategies was the two teams where I drafted Jimmy Graham in the second round. I wish I done that, or drafted Calvin Johnson, or a top tier quarterback, more often. Matt Stafford was a rock on two teams. Russell Wilson was almost never huge, but always dependable. 

One of the things that has become most apparent to me this fantasy season is that I don't enjoy fantasy football very much. I mean I don't enjoy it in the sense that is a pleasurable experience to me. I have one league, the only league I play year after year, where I look like a clown every year, and can't even fathom why I never win. If I won in every other league, which I came close to doing multiple times later this year, and lost in that league, I was unhappy. I'm starting to question whether or not I should even play fantasy football next year. I guess a lot of that will depend on how I do in the playoffs, although I can see in every league except one I do not have the best team. Whatever I say here, I know I'll get that familiar urge to start checking the fantasy mock drafts as soon as February. Maybe I need to find a better way to waste my time.

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