Watching Braveheart With John

Watching Braveheart With John 
I made the mistake
Of watching Braveheart
With my friend John.

Midway through the
Torture sequence
(And keep in mind
This is a first viewing)
John catapults into
A tirade:

"That movie, Signs,
What the fuck was
Up with that, motherfucker?
Worst fucking movie
I ever saw.
Hope you're suffering
You son of a bitch.
Oh yeah, shove that thing
All the way up his anti-
Semetic ass.
M Shammalammadingdong
My ass.
I want my seven godamn
Dollars back.
I hope it hurts
Like hell you
Motherfucker."

I didn't get much
Out of the movie after that

And it didn't seem to
Make any sense explaining
To John

That addressing your problems
To a two dimensional

Fictional character portraying
A mythical 11th century character
Wasn't going to get his
Money back or make
M Shammalammadingdong
Movies any more watchable.

But I guess I know
How he felt.

Most likely the same way
You feel about
Me right now.

But you're not getting
Your money back
Either. Pin It