Tuesday, December 4, 2012

I Am Insane


I discovered I was mentally ill when I was fifteen. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and Schizoid Personality Disorder. The combination of the two has been a heavy disadvantage to me in life, especially when trying to accomplish any task that involves dealing with other people socially. I write about mental illness quite a lot either directly or indirectly, and when I do I never mean to be disrespectful, I simply believe the arts should always play a role in whatever joys or sorrows one is experiencing in life. "I Am Insane" is a poem a wrote about choices we can make that could put one at odds with what society considers "normal" behavior. On occasion it becomes difficult to know whether it's the illness speaking or if one is just odd and at odds with society as a whole. And even if a person is marching to the beat of their own drum is that a mental illness? 

I Am Insane

I am insane 
Because I will not
Chase your dollar
Through fields of 
Wild Foxglove

I am insane
Because I bay at the
Bloodmoon
And will not bray
At beer commercials
And do not obey
Your traffic signals

I am insane
Because on my switchboard
All calls to Allah, Yahweh,
Jehovah, Zoroaster and
Santa Clause are all
Answered by the same operator

I am insane 
Because I held up
The Bank of America
With a holdup note
Composed of haikus
And demanded only
The teller deposit
My .12 residual check
I earned for appearing
On The Banana Splits
As a child.

I am insane 
Because to me
The difference between
A story and a true story
Is less important than
The difference between
Schlitz and Blatz

I am insane
Because I interfere
With the re-uptake
Of your serotonin
Re-uptake inhibitors

I am insane 
Because in the elevator
Of my psyche
There are buttons labeled
Pluto, Cucamonga,
Kokomo, Sheboygan, Padukah
Algonquin Round Table,
Deep Night and Help
(Don't press that one).
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3 comments:

  1. That Dude Eddie sent me over, and I'm so thankful. Isn't it true that a huge percentage of great artists are somewhat insane? They struggle to reconcile this harsh world with their sensitivities. Who are the Zombies really? Great poem...I especially love "the elevator of your psyche", that is pure genius! Jen

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  2. I love your perspective. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Well there is a thin line between genius and insanity I always say. You are able to create great works of art! Your brain can tap into things a normal one cant, to me that's a blessing. Stay awesome!

    Peace and Love.

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